To Dylzaree From Dylzaree… A Letter to Confused Minds

Seriously, Dylzaree Recentes, the only child of Rebecca and Rizaldy Recentes, what have you been eating?

Why does three (3) INCs and one (1) F not alarm you anymore? Are you going crazy or something?

What has gotten into your cooky head?

First of all, you were not once like this. But of course you weren’t unless I wouldn’t be asking you all of these damn questions.
Just think, you are now at the peak of you College year! You are absolutely crazy to not be taking any of these offenses seriously. What are you thinking about right now. chicken? Stop it. This is insane. How on Earth, in heaven’s name, in all of the universe will you graduate in four year’s time with this kind of record? Kindly explain to me how the hell you are going to take your internship this summer. How are you going to break this news to your mother? Think. Think. Think.

I don’t now where you went wrong along the road to experiencing everything and anything you can grab your hands on. But honestly, along that road, you lost sight of the other priorities. You weren’t looking and thinking hard enough, that’s for sure and your grip on your other priorities weren’t that hard and secure either. So another question, what can you do now?

Dearest Nagging Dylzaree inside me crazy mind,
Well what do you think? Of course I don’t have any answers to your 20 20 questions. Otherwise you wouldn’t be asking them if I did already have answers.

All my INCs freak me out, yes. And my F?! The hell! I have an F it’s effin insane. But why don’t I feel my heart aching or my world about to crush? I don’t know still. I guess I didn’t do anything entirely WRONG or stupid. I guess my priorities, yes, were not set straight. There were a dozen things that I chose to do other than what was already set for me and this reason might just drive my mother mad. Anyway, why I’m not sad or freaking out or clawing my eyes out over my INCs and F? (Shit fuck I have an F) Well, because what’s done has been done. Those grades have already been posted online, you see and I cannot do anything except accept that fact and not dwell on those INCs and 1 F. 

If my classmates had found out oh lord they would freak! My mother would probably cry and my father will probably hang me. But other than that, shit, it’s already been done. I’d made my choice and though they were not totally wrong, there were things I should have attended to first. But do I regret, sort always choosing dance first? Well, no. Not one bit, because every second of it I’ve cherished. I cannot exchange those experiences, and would not exchange those experiences for any other. No classroom professor or instructor could have given me the opportunities that dance so far had. I had wanted a life different from any other ordinary student, hence my predicament now. But I am going to make this work. If I have to extend a year or to be able to do my internship outside of Visayas and Mindanao, then so be it (?). That is if my mother and father will permit me. If not, I will have to make do and not be so idealistic then. But whatever happened to dreaming big, huh? Yes, dreaming big. But nowadays, following one’s bliss seems to be more appealing and satisfying than conforming to a standard of norms.

What oh what will my mother say to that? So help me God.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s